Monday, October 28, 2013

Yakamatsu (iii)

Yakamatsu girl and her cyber boyfriend Skype 3 times a day. Everyday.

Today (Sunday) she woke up at 6 in the morning to sing to him


In the Morning.

To sing.


I opened my sweet little eyes and with the smile of a tigress in heat who has just been woken up from her beauty sleep by a stampede of monkeys high on Ecstasy asked her to SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Anyway, a couple of days ago I noticed a wine glass besides her computer.
Then I realized, every time she talks with this dude there's a wine glass.
I'm not stalking. Just noticing patterns.

Maybe I should mention that in this apartment, I'm the alcoholic one.
I'm the one that has her wine rack stuffed with a Savignon blanc, a Riesling, a Moscato, a Rosso, a Verde, a Late Harvest, an Uzo, an Amaretto, a Cointreau and... some weird Chocolate wine a guy gave me for my birthday.
Ummm, now that I think about it... I'm the one that OWNS a wine rack.

So, this girl doesn't buy wine, doesn't drink mine but still... has a wine glass by her laptop all the time.

What the hey?
Is she a phantom alcoholic?
What does she drink?
There was a left-over of whatever she was drinking. It was something wine-like-color, wine-like-texture, but it didn't smell like any wine I know.
OH MY GOD!!! "any wine I know"... am I an alcoholic???

---  anyway ---

So, I'm curious and I decide to ask her about the glass:

Ummm... sweetie... are we getting drunk on love??
No, no, no... it's that I want [cyber boyfriend's name] to think I'm an experienced woman. I don't want him to think I'm lame.
LAME!?!?!?!?! YOU?!?!?!?!? NAAAAAAHHHHHH...
[cool it Mafe, be nice!]
So yeah, I drink apple juice while I talk to him and pretend is something... ummmm... stronger?
You DO realize he sees you "happy on wine" at 6 in the morning every weekday, right?!?!?!
Nope, not lame. Not lame at all.

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