Friday, May 24, 2013

I see dead people

"Dead people don't talk, dead people don't walk...
dead people don't write, dead people don't call you on the phone.
When dead people show up, they come as scary ghosts."
Mafe, March 2012.

I recently watched "Extremely loud and Incredibly close" as recommended by Largo.
"Watch it, we'll discuss it after you do. It's a really interesting movie, it's full of symbolism  You'll like it, I promise --- Nooooo, you won't cry, it's not THAT sad."

Man!! I cried 2/3 of the movie!

Typical story about a nice family, working dad, working mom, funky boy with Asperger syndrome who has an amazing relationship with his dad but he (the dad) dies on 9/11 (yes, overrated I know but wait... this movie is actually good).

They play scavenger's hunts around the house, around the city, play mental games and have inside jokes that only they understand.
On the "worse day", that's how the boy calls 9/11, the dad calls home trying to reach someone and let them know he's fine and letting them know how much he loves them (Cheesy, I know!!! but this movie is good, trust me). He leaves 6 messages on the answering machine. Each one of them sadder and more heart-breaking that the one before.

"If the sun were to explode, you wouldn't even know about it for 8 minutes because that's how long it takes for light to travel to us.
For eight minutes the world would still be bright and it would still feel warm.
It was a year since my dad died and I could feel my eight minutes with him... were running out."

One year later, the boy decides to extend those 8 minutes, and look for a way to reconnect with his dad.

He doesn't want to let go of him.
He finds clues all over the city about his dad; about his past and about his future.
He meets many different people and reconnects with people from his past.
He reconnects with the city.

Is the father really dead?
Who are the people he met along the way?
Are they important? What are their roles in this journey?
What will he find in the end?

Will he get the chance to talk to his dad one last time?
What would he say to him?

I'm not going to spoil the movie for you, it gets weird, annoying at times and super sad. All at the same time.
In the end, I found myself sitting in my living room laying on my new and fluffy red rug... thinking and crying.

What would you do if you had the chance to talk to a dead person?
Would you take the chance to grab 8 more minutes with them?
Would you ask for explanations or tell them all that's in your heart?
Would you listen or talk?
Would you take the risk of hearing whatever they have to say? even though it may break you apart?

Seeing dead people is not normal. It can be scary I guess.

Keep in mind that dead people are dead. Ghost never come back. Use your time wisely and enjoy those last 8 minutes... they'll never come back.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Bloody quesadillas

I checked my facebook timeline and I saw that a friend from a long time ago was in town for a wedding. I sent him a DM asking him out for a coffee or a drink and talk before he leaves... he's a super funny guy, I give him my number and hope for the best.
No, I'm not hitting on him. He's just a sweet guy. Let's call him "Pedrito".

Anyway, my Sunday goes pretty mellow: sleep a little more, clean my apartment, bike to the market, bike to the music hall, jazz concert at the music hall, bike home, have friends over to help me move some furniture and cook a couple of dishes for the week.

Just in the middle of the "I'm trying a new rice recipe with some weird rice I got on the marker. It's a really weird rice and I feel I need to measure the humidity and moistness of the mix"... the guy calls and asks me out for dinner.

OH MAN!!!!

Whatever, this guy is super funny and I haven't seen him in a long time... see you later rice! be a good boy and don't turn into risotto while I'm gone!!!

We make things easy and head to the bar/restaurant across the street from my house.

When we arrive, the bartender and some of the bar's regulars greet him as "Heeeeeeey!! Pedrito!!!" and "Heeeeeeeey!! Mafe!!!".
Oh God, have I become part of the bar regulars???

Anyway, the bartender greets Pedrito and asks him about one of his friends... and then, EVERY SINGLE PERSON sitting at the bar starts asking about the same dude. The same dude I can't talk to and don't know if I should try to talk to, and it kinda hurts to talk to and... oh crap!!
"Yeah, how is so-and-so?"
"Is he still living in ....?"
"Is he working at the...?"
"He's a really funny guy. I loved that one!"
"We miss him, specially during game season."
[What game? I don't know... but he was fun according to the geezer at the bar]

Oh man. Stab me with a knife and twist it a little more please?
And then... the bartender sees me and asks: "Wait... Mafe, didn't you come with HIM the last time he was in town?"
Great, my cover is blown.
I remember you guys looked as if you were...
I didn't know you guys were...
Oh nooooooononononono, we're not. We're friends, that's all.
Tell him I said Hi next time you see him.
Suuuuure! [insert fake smiley face here].

Now Pedrito and Mafe sit down and are eating quesadillas, drinking, talking... talking... talking.
And since Pedrito is such a good friend with the dude... he starts talking about HIM.
Take the knife ouf of the wound, put some lemon on it and put it in again... and twist it.

You know what? I'm gonna call him and tell him I'm having dinner with you! He'll be jealous!!
Ay no Pedrito... it's ok, I'm sure he's busy. 
It's Sunday, he has time! It'll be fun! 
Pedrito no, don't bother.
Oh Mafe... don't be silly. Come on!
We're not THAT interesting, don't.... please?
Wait... it's ringing.
[Oh... mother of God, please don't pick up, please don't pick up, please don't pick up. I promise I'll be good, I'll go to Sunday mass... Dear Santa, I know I've been asking for a car but I'll change my Xmas wish for this one. I'll pet kittens, I'll repent, I'll be good... pleaaaaseeeee don't pick up!!!]

........... and in here you'll have the longest 30 seconds of my life .......

Voice mail... that guy is always so busy.
I'm sure he is, it's ok... some other time maybe [Thank you baby Jesus!!!]

Anyway, he's a good guy, it's just that sometimes he gets so busy...
I remember when went to ...
And then, there was this other time...
Last year, we went to San Diego and...

So, without me knowing it, I was listening to a ton of stories stories from this dude, I'm sitting in front of his best friend telling me what a good person he is, how much fun they had, how is he a great worker. Pedrito didn't know the last time the dude and I talked it got super ugly.
Pedrito was telling me everything I already knew.
Sweet Pedrito was stabbing me over and over and over again, making me feel stupid for what the dude and I did...

Something needs to be done. What? I honestly don't know.

Excuse me, I need to go to the hospital, I may bleed to death.

A little black dress

According to all fashion gurus, all women should have at least one little black dress in their closet.
That little black dress fashionable enough to look professional and pretty, but a dress that can be turned into a fun and sexy piece of wardrobe with a slight change of earrings, shoes or belt.

I had... none.

Nothing, I had one or two dresses that looked like XL moo-moo gowns, circus tents or ponchos.
Nothing pretty.

Today, I have... well... an orange one, a blue, a lilac, a gray, a green, a red, a brown one...  and THREE little black dresses,
I fit into small size dresses now. If you can't believe it, don't worry, neither can I.
From those 3 dresses, the first one was a present from my former roommate for my birthday last year.
The second was a Christmas present from my aunt Tita.
The third one was on sale and my friend told me I looked super cute in it so... I HAD to buy it.


This Friday was a friend's birthday and she wanted to go out for dinner and then dancing with all her friends.
She wanted her birthday to be something "fancy but fun".

It was a chance for me to wear one of my little black dresses.
The one with the cleavage is the only one I can wear in this weather... oh God!! why did I let my roommate give me that thing?!?!?!
I'm not comfortable showing that much skin.
I am truly NOT comfortable looking down and seeing 'all that' out in the open.
I am honestly NOT comfortable with that.

When I arrived at the restaurant, P&T asked me to sit in between them so I felt relieved.
"Sitting with the kiddies is going to make dinner easy" or so I thought:
P&T: Mafe!... you look pretty today.
Me: Thanks guys, that's sweet!
Yeah, you should wear more dresses like that. Your boobs look nice.
WHAT!?!?!?! Duuuuuuudes!!!!!!
Yeah, you look like the girls on tv.
Oh man...
Where are the moo-moos and the ponchos when I need them!?!?!?!

Dinner's over, the kids and their parents leave, and the rest of us go dancing: Salsa, merengue... ing the night away.

I'm still feeling uncomfortable and I don't know if I can stand to long.
I'll probably leave early.

Yeah, I'll do that.

Then Mr. M., my coolest local guy-friend comes towards me...
MrM: "Parce", we can't let that dress go to waste (Parce = colombian slang for "dude")
Me: What are you talking about?
You never wear dresses and you don't go to work looking THIS HOT... we can't let that dress go to waste.
C'mon Parce... you look pretty. Dance with me?
I'm not going to apologize for telling the truth, you look good and you know it.

And so we danced all night, every time he asked me to, he said the same thing: "C'mon, that dress is not going to be wasted", and smiled.

So yeah, every woman needs that little one black dress that makes her look super hot.

More important, every woman needs at least one male friend who's close enough to say good and bad things about you in your face.
A couple of babies will do the same, but keep in mind, kids don't have filters and they will blurt out the truth. Be ready for anything.

... We all need confidence boosts from time to time and I got two in one night.
 Life's good.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Mr. Big (iii)

What's up little lady?
Remember how last weekend I got a new/old bike?
Well, this weekend I cleaned it, I fixed it and I bought a U-lock, not a chain... so it doesn't get stolen again and I have a new/old bike!!... AGAIN!!!!!
I'm going to give it a name, but I can't think of something catchy.
Nati calls hers "Orange Clockwork", Juglar mentioned "Grace", Maja calls hers "Enterprise" and suggested "Lucrecia" like the girl from The Borgias...
Lucrecia was my grandmother's name.
Ohhhh... oops?
How about Matilda!
Awwww... like it!
Oh no! wait!!! call her LEIA!!!
Say whaaaaaaaaaaat??? why?!?!?!
We called my new car Luke, we can call your new bike Leia!
That's nice!!
Of course.
I gave Luke a present... what are you going to give my Leia?
Let's just call it Matilda and be happy, ok?

So, to make things fun, LEIA LUCRECIA it is!!

Leia Lucrecia @ Mt Storm Park, Clifton.
Cincinnati, OH

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Baby talk (part trois)

I have two amazing "adopted" nephews, a couple of 6-year-old twins. I'll call them P&T.
They come to my house and play, and jump all over the place... and clean!
Can you believe than?!? their two favorite "toys" in my apartment are my Swiffer mop and my vacuum... I love those two little monsters!!!!!!
They play Frisbee better than anyone I know, and yes, they love their iPads.


M: Are we ready for ice cream?
P&T: Yessssssssssssssss!!!
M: Ok, get in the car.
P&T: How come you're driving daddy's car?
M: It's the one with your baby seats.
P&T: They're called GROWING YOUNG BOYS seats.
M: Oh... my bad.


(They met my cactus for the first time...) 
Careful little dudes! no touching... they're prickly!
No, they're no--- OWWWWW!!!
C'mon. Sit on the bed. I'll take those things out... let me get my tweezers.
No way!! you're not coming anywhere near us with those things.
Sit... down...
Sit... down...or I'll call your mom and she'll take them out.
O... k... let's not get violent... we're all friends here.

Ok, don't move...
It's not working!! It hurts!!
It's because I can't see... let me get my glasses...
(all better)
WOW... where can we find glasses like those?!?!?! Are those Iron Man's?!?!


Mommy told us you were going to help us move to our new apartment.
Yes, I am.
Don't you want to play with us instead?
Dudes, I promised your mom and dad I'll help.
They need big and strong people, like M and E... 
I'm big... and strong and all that. Don't you think?
Dude... you get scared with the Monkeys when we play "Temple Run".
Shut up and give me the iPad!!

Wouldn't you be terrified if something like THAT was chasing you?!?!