Heartless

... and the woman from the other post left.

And there was a farewell party for her.
And she invited me.
And after thinking a million times about attending or not the dinner-thing, I did.
And as I said good-bye to her before leaving the restaurant I gave her a hug and...

"Listen, I truly hope you're happy.
You deserve all the happiness the world has for you.
I'm sorry for anything wrong of hurtful I ever said or did to you.
I don't have anything against you. You were a good friend in the past.
There's a part of me that died, and whoever is left now can't be friends with you.
Have a safe trip and a great life.
I'm not sure if this is a good-bye forever, maybe when I'm alive again, I'll call you and we can catch up on life, but now is not the moment. You'll hurt me and I'll hurt you, I know that.
Someone once told me 'I never used you to be happy, things just happened'... and well, now I'm saying it to you."

All she said was: "Don't... just... don't... you'll make me cry."

"You're crying because you choose to. I'm just saying I'm' sorry and Good-bye.
No one deserves your tears. No one. Don't waste them on someone like me."

And I left.

I have no regrets of what I said. All of it was true.
I don't feel hate or sadness.
As much as I keep thinking I don't think I'll miss her.
Maybe I didn't wanted to be close to her anymore.
Maybe I wanted an easy way out of a relationship and took the first train out of it.

This is how it feels to be heartless, I guess.